Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Ami udbo...gaan gaibo...

why do you despair? i have laid the world at your feet to explore and conquer...and still you say you are unhappy?
you know you made me to fly...and now that i've learnt how to fly you want to clip my wings and reduce me to walking...what use is all the land in this world if i don't have the endless sky to float in? this cage you want to put me in may be made of gold but it's a cage...
what cage do you talk of? i wish to make you a king amongst men...
i'd rather be a vagabond amongst birds...i want to fly high and wide over this world...i want to sing so that the world can listen...i know how it feels to fly across the boundless sky...i know how it feels to make even a single person happy with my song...and now you want me to give up my gifts of flight and song and live like those myriad small creatures trying to tie us to the ground...you consign me to a life consumed by slow decay...give me the earth if you wish to, but don't take my beloved sky away for that...
har kisi ko muqammal jahaan nahin milta, kabhi zamin to kabhi aasmaan nahin milta...
to kheench lo mere pairon tale se ye zameen...par udne do mujhe is khule aasmaan mein...

what about her? won't you accept your fate even to stay with her?
she is all i've ever desired...she is the one who has always heard me sing...she is the one who has always seen me fly...i can't imagine life without her...i am the most untainted by your world's corruption when i'm with her...
so you'll give up your unreasonable dreams of flying for her?
no...if i were to get an eternity with her in exchange of flight it would be an eternity of torment for me and for her...it is she who inspires me to fly...it is she who inspires me to sing...i couldn't bear the torment of being with her with clipped wings and muted voice...
do you realise what you wish for? you leave the trodden path to do what you like...you will have to make your own trail in the sky...you will have to fight...
i am willing to fight even against you father...i am willing to doom my soul to eternal damnation if i can fly for even a single fleeting moment...if one song of mine gives an ephemeral smile to the face of one single person, i am willing to die for the ability to sing it...you made me to fly father...you taught me to sing...let me fly...let me sing...or let me die dreaming of it...


" Yash, maan, khyati...
Na, chai na...Ami udbo, gaan gaibo..."
-From the play 'Tota Kahini' by Gautam Sengupta based on a short story by Rabindranath Tagore.